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With six weeks of an intensive pain program under my belt I’m finally able to see the finish line of this 8-week journey. The lack of blogs and posts the past few weeks likely tells its own story – I’m exhausted! But apart from exhaustion, are there things to be learnt? Has this been a worthwhile experience or a lesson in futility?!

So today my journey finally began, and I have a ton of mixed emotions about going into the St. Judes’ Chronic Pain Program here in Orange County, CA. It’s a curious emotional cocktail of anxiety, hope, fear, curiosity, doubt, stress, courage, and even skepticism. Somehow I just refuse to give up hope, even when the odds for pain relief seem stacked in the wrong direction. There is in most of us an indomitable spirit that ultimately just wants to keep going. But there are so many questions: Is this the end of the line? What if I fail in the program or rather, if the program fails me? What are realistic expectations? Is it possible to set goals when there are so many unknowns?